Bonding

What does it mean to be bonded?

     Let's start by bursting your bubble. You will never be your glider's friend. Gliders do not gliderify people the way we personify animals. They need and want the things you provide them, but they will not feel gratitude toward you or even understand that you are their provider. They do not perceive it as you giving them a treat, but as them taking a treat from you, just like they take things from each other.

     The bond between a human and glider happens when the glider recognizes your scent, sound, and ambiance, trusts that you are a safe location, and thinks they can find food on you. I believe that gliders perceive us as though we are their tree in many respects. We are a warm, protective shelter to sleep in, with branches to play on, and treats to forage,

     Some signs of a mature bond are

Rubs chest against you to mark you
Leaps out of cage onto you without hesitation
Generally stays on you, or returns to you easily, while in familiar territory
Sleeps on you or hides in your clothing
Prefers to defecate on you (gross, but its a sign of love :)
Walks onto back of your hand when offered

What it doesn't mean to be bonded

Even bonded gliders won't be perfect little angels all the time, and they will never obey you like a dog would. Bonded gliders will still occasionally:

Nip and bite without drawing blood, especially when booty dancing.
Jump off from you to explore
Crab at you for waking them up, or at certain sounds, like rustling plastic
Face hug you (land a glide on your face unexpectedly)
Object to rough or overly friendly handling
Play rough. For instance Dazzle likes to stalk and pounce my fingertips while I type.

Building a healthy bond

You will build trust with your gliders through respectful handling, scent tricks and edible bribery. Each positive experience your glider has with you will be a step toward a healthy bond, and each negative experience can hinder the process.

Bourbon Hackworth is our community's glider whisperer. She has helped many build relationships with difficult gliders over the years. Her guidance was instrumental to me when learning to bond with my first gliders, Acrimony and Milquetoast. She stresses the importance of understanding the glider's perspective. I learned quite a few tips from her, and many others in the community.

Respectful handling

Have a secure area for bonding time, such as a pop up tent, so the glider can safely jump and explore.
Hide your palms from the glider.
Be the bridge between where the glider is and where they want to go.
Hold the back of your hand out for the glider to climb onto it, position your hand about a half inch below them so they step down.
Be patient, and wait for all four feet. Gliders commonly employ a "safety foot" tactic.
Hold a treat (live mealworm) over your hand, guide them onto it, give the treat, let them run away. Repeat until they do not run away.
When they are on you, watch their eyes, move them to where they look, let them climb off.
Keep lighting dim or indirect.
Stand if possible. Gliders quickly lose interest in a sitting person.
Guide gliders by using your hands as walls in front of them to block them.
If you must control them, a hand gently across their back and light fingertip pressure down their nose, keep your fingers out of the bite zone.
Gentle blowing in their face, or on the back of their ears will distract and discourage unwanted behavior, like nipping.
Drag a feather up your arm for the glider to chase. Long feathers are helpful during escapes.
If they escape catch them in a pouch, or butterfly net, or loose fleece rather than your hands. Feathers can help this. Fleece with foreign glider scent works the best for luring them.

Try to Avoid

Grabbing them around their spine, instead you should support their feet.
Touching their tail when they are active, feel free during cuddly time.
Confining them with your hands when awake, feel free during cuddly time.
Making sudden movements, keep your motions slow and smooth
Taking pictures or video too much. They aren't fond of the bright light.
Chasing them. Try feathers, mealworms, and stinky pouches to lure them

Scent Tricks

Gliders are scent-based animals. They mark their colony members and territory with secretions from their head, chest, and cloacal scent glands, as well as a constant dabbing of urine as they walk. Gliders will usually accept another into their colony after at least three days of sleeping in the scent of the new member. Importantly, research emphasizes the requirement that the foreign scent must be in the sleeping nest to form colony associations, not just in the cage. This means you want the glider to smell you while they sleep.

Put their clean sleeping pouch in your bed for a few nights while you sleep to pick up your scent
Tuck a fleece square in your clothes and hit the gym until it stinks.
If possible, all day while they are sleeping; wear the gliders in a bonding pouch around your neck, under your shirt
Keep a glider shirt that you don't wash often to wear during playtime.
When cleaning the cage, do not wash all of their items at once.
No matter how filthy their initial pouch is, don't wash it for the first week they are home with you. (If it is truly that bad, cut it into squares and tuck the most usable unwashed pieces into the clean one)

Try to Avoid

Deodorant, perfume, scented soaps, etc during early bonding.
Having foreign glider scent on you during early bonding.
Washing their items in scented soap, instead use free and clear detergents, or white vinegar.
Using air freshener or scented candles near their cages.

Treats

I cannot stress the importance of bribery in bonding. For the first few months with a new joey don't worry about over feeding them treats. Let them get fat if they must, they will grow into it in time and they will have already learned to think of you as the treat fairy by the time you have to impose a stricter diet. Don't waste your greatest bonding asset during their formative months just because you are counting calories.

Mealworms are their scooby snacks. My gliders know the sound of the mealworm bag and come running to it. This is exceedingly helpful when trying to find them in the playroom, or when they escape down the hall. Mealworms also make it possible to trim their nails; they get so distracted they don't care what I do to their feet.

The tamest glider I've ever seen was hand fed everything she ever ate. This is probably not practical for the average owner, but there are some easier tricks we can pull using this wisdom.

Make an identifiable sound every time you give treats through the cage bars, such as ringing the bars, tsking, shaking their treat container, etc.
Watch your gliders at dinner time to see what they grab first, usually corn or avocado for mine.
Before putting their food in the cage, hand feed each glider a piece of their favorite item. This also prevents feeding time escapes.
Gliders often take food and run, but if you can handle the squeamies keep hold of one end of that mealworm and let them eat it from your fingers.
Cover your fingertip in something delicious, like squished avocado, smushed yogi, jelly, honey, or yogurt and let them lick it clean.
Licky treats can help teach a glider to lick when a hand enters their pouch rather than lunge and bite.
Gliders like to eat and play with dandelions (from untreated yards only)
Apart from mealworms, gliders also like live or dried cricket & grasshopper, hormworms, waxworms, and frozen pinky mice (thaw first)
As well as yogurt drops, dried fruit, pecans/walnuts, marshmellows, bread, just about any meat/poultry,
Gliders like monkey biscuits, and they help to keep their teeth clean. Leave a couple in the cage for a dry daytime snacking food.

Try to Avoid

Garlic, onion, chocolate, and rhubarb are bad for gliders.
Avoid going too nuts on the corn, its ca:p ratio is atrocious.
Some glider owners caution against nuts as a choking hazard and common allergen, I don't agree with the precaution and do feed mine nuts regularly.
Some caution against citrus fruit for fear of diarrhea, again I don't agree with this precaution and regularly feed citrus without incident.